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Any parent that has young children understands the challenges that can from eating out. Some children throw tantrums, shout, throw food, and do a wide variety of other things that aren’t generally socially acceptable. It’s not hard to be tempted to swear off of eating out while the kids are young. However, challenges like these represent wonderful teaching opportunities. With a little patience, perseverance, and consistency, your kids can learn to model good behavior while eating in a restaurant. There are several tips and strategies that can be used to move you in the direction of a better experience for the family while eating out. The next time you go to a restaurant like Tony Roma’s, keep these tips in mind:
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Set the Tone Early
Begin talking about the planned outing to a restaurant early. Keep a gentle yet firm tone and cover the positives as well as the intended behaviors you want the children to model. You might begin by saying, “Jimmy, I’d like you to use your indoor voice when we go to the Olive Garden on Friday night.” You can continue by explaining that the food is going to be delicious but we will still need to be on our very best behavior and use our table manners. Explain, in detail, what manners you want them to model. It could be keeping their elbows off the table, using a napkin, or simply saying please and thank you. However, don’t overload them with expectations. Pick three of the most important behaviors you’d like them to model and focus on them.
Practice at Home
Set up a restaurant atmosphere at home and make it a fun night for practicing good dining etiquette. Fix the children’s favorite meal, set the table, and have them sit as if they were at a restaurant. This is a fun and practical way to teach good etiquette that will make it much easier for the children to duplicate the behavior.
Create a Small Reward System
Create a fun challenge for the children. Once you’ve had the children practice the intended behaviors you want them to model, offer to reward them for successfully accomplishing at least two of the expected behaviors. The rewards should be something they would place value on, like extra time on the XBOX, a new toy, or a fun outing.
Be Consistent
Once you’ve set the goal, don’t deviate from it. If a child fails to accomplish at least two of the desired behaviors, you can still encourage him or her for accomplishing one, however, do not give them the rewards they would have gotten had they accomplished the set amount of two. If you don’t follow through and stand behind the expectations you set for them, their behavior will not change. Show them you are serious by honoring your own words.
Use a Consequence Only as a Last Resort
If you have a child that shows no interest in following the standards you’ve set for him or her, give them a warning and then tell them they will lose a favored privilege for a short period of time. However, this is not effective if you don’t follow through with the threat.You’d be surprised at how much your children’s behavior will change and improve when you set a standard, help them model the expected behavior, and provide rewards and if necessary, consequences. You don’t have to be angry or stern to get the behavior you want from your children. More than anything, it takes consistency. You can be firm and gentle, yet consistent, and you will see changes in your children’s behavior in a shorter period of time than you would have imagined.