So I guess I know a little about twins. I know you will keep treasuring your twin daughters because we twins really are a different breed–all the more so when the parents do not try to make us the same person. I think that is the challenge for all parents of twins. For some parents this is very easy and for others very difficult. You know, some parents think it’s so cute to dress us up alike and everyone says, “Oh! Look at them! They’re so cute!”

This can make it hard for twins to see themselves as individuals, because we grow up with everyone gawking at “us” and describing our similarities and differences as if we are two halves of a whole. I don’t know how it is for fraternal twins, but we identical twins have a special need to see ourselves as individuals as early as possible. Or maybe that’s one way we’re like everybody else. But I have long felt that twins who cannot recognize themselves as individuals have a self-identity disability. And that’s my point–twins can have their own kind of disability even when they’re knocking down straight A’s in school. Some of my teenage students have suffered from it without realizing it. I’m all for you and your kids. If they don’t think they are oddities, and if they see themselves as loved and competent individuals, they’ll flourish. Tell ‘em I think they’re smart, and send them my love!